Happy Monday everyone!
Over in my weekly Spiritual Newsletter I was talking about how last week totally kicked my butt (and from what I hear from others, I wasn't the only one).
For me I had a lot of lessons around boundaries and letting myself go down with other people's ships - but really just because other people around me are having a hard time, doesn't mean that I have to be too. This brought up a lot of familiar feelings from when I totally neglected myself after the death of my dad when I was 21. I spent so much time trying to keep others afloat during a difficult time where I needed support too, that in the end I spiralled and ended up having a breakdown in 2019, feeling such low self worth because of putting myself last for so long.
Life doesn't come without it's challenges, but what is does do when we are delivered another curveball is we are given a choice of how we deal with that situation. Even if that curveball feels the same as it has done every other time before - just know that you don't have to repeat the same actions and you do have a choice in picking a different path.
There is a saying that you should always put on your own life jacket before helping others to put on theirs, and I can't agree more with this. What good are we if we all drown? Wouldn't be better to make sure that YOU are okay, so you be the best version of yourself that you can be - and that can then be passed on to others?
It's a conversation that I've had to have with a lot of clients over the years, but it does seem to have a deep message lately with how many people are putting themselves last to their detriment, meaning that actually no one wins in the end.
Last week I lay down my boundaries and gave more of myself than I would willingly usually do for another person, and the results were not good (to put it nicely!). I felt like I had no control, no say and like I didn't matter - which is a place I have been before, and I know a lot of people will resonate with this too. My Self worth really suffered and I felt like I was going down with the ship, which was a horrible feeling to experience again. But something I did have this time, is access to my Spiritual Intuition and my practices - something that I didn't have last time I had felt this awful.
On Friday I cleared my diary for the day (something that I've not ever had to do) and pressed the reset button in looking at how I could feel more in control again. I grounded outside and meditated, looking for reassurance from my guides. I went to the gym and blew off some steam, I had a salt bath to regulate my nervous system, and I showed myself so much love. I showed myself that I am worthy and how I feel is important and focused on all the things that I CAN control. I then took part in a powerful Breathwork Session inside of my Awakened Ones membership programme where lovely Stacey Elizabeth (Instagram handle - staceymanifests) held space for us, and it was truly wonderful in releasing all the baggage and limiting beliefs that had built up during the week, and I went into the weekend feeling like a completely different person. 🙌🥰
It's amazing how quickly you can turn yourself around after making a mistake in giving away your energy, not setting healthy boundaries or speaking up and how you can swiftly move forward again with the knowledge you have learnt from making that 'mistake' - which really is a life lesson.
For me, I asked my guides what the lesson was here, and they told me 'that I was never to go back', meaning back to the dark place that went in 2019 where I let myself be bottom of the pile. It was quite sweet how after they gave me the message that a Fleetwood Mac song 'Never Going Back Again' came on my playlist - which is about not repeating previous mistakes, and just reinforced the message for me.
So you may be wondering how you can put yourself first, set better boundaries, and not go down with other people's ships when times get tough - especially if you feel you have others depending on you so greatly (such as children). The message is always the same, that you should always put on your life jacket first, so that you can be that assistance to others thereafter. If you are okay, everyone else will be okay - but it has to be in that order.
You may have to speak up and ask for further support for a short time, you may have to pivot and change course, you may have to make difficult decisions that ultimately you know will help your situation in the long run. Whatever it is when you set those boundaries and do all you can to preserve your energy first, just know that you focusing on what you can control (rather than what you can't) will help you massively, therefore helping those around you.
When we have better energy and know our worth first - what we give to others is a better version of ourselves too, which in the end is better all around.
Sometimes, you may feel like you are neglecting others to put yourself first. For example, I work with a lot of mothers who are trying to make a better life for themselves and their children by
setting up a successful business, and in doing that they feel like they are taking themselves away from their kids in the meantime. This can result in the mum giving up on her dream business and staying in a place of lack, in a job that she hates - which doesn't serve anyone, where if she placed her focus on driving forward that big idea to create the income she desires in her business for a short time - she will give herself and her children everything in the end. Ultimately in the end that mother is able to access the best version of herself to give more to her family and others, so whilst it can feel really 'backward' in putting ourself first, we can then give so much more as a result from doing that - where everyone wins.
Although this all may sound very simple, I know that in reality it's not always easy to implement, so when you feel like you are putting yourself last and falling - just take some time to press the reset button, and look at the ways that you can regain control of what you have by setting better boundaries and focus. You get to be the driver of your life, and when those curveballs come flying, remember that you have a choice how to play out.
I hope this week's blog post has helped, and I look forward to seeing what Spirit have in store for next week!
Love Josie xxx
The Psychic Energy Healer
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